Focus on weight loss

Today was a much better day than yesterday as far as my professional goals were concerned. I made it to the shop about 9:30, which is not the time I was shooting for, but once I got there I was very productive. I got most of the way through my stack of mail and papers that has accumulated in the almost 2 weeks since I've been out there, and I got somewhat organized. Now I just need to get the office cleaned and continue to work on some more paperwork issues, which will hopefully not take more than a couple of weeks, and I will be able to start focusing on marketing and building the business itself. I also maintained the cleaning I did at home yesterday and washed Cooper's bottles (which takes 45 minutes!), so I was pretty happy with that.

My diet and exercise goals, however have completely fallen by the wayside. I swear I could sell ice to an eskimo, because despite my adamant promises to myself that I would get up early and exercise, I continued to hit snooze until it finally quit going off altogether. Then I was going to go at lunch, but I forgot the gym doesn't have a class at lunchtime on Wednesdays. So instead I hit the Pizza Hut buffet with D.R. and completely stuffed my face until I was miserable. Great job, Amanda!! Might as well continue the day that way, so I had a root beer float and a bunch of mini snickers mid-afternoon. Part of my problem for the last few years is that my 5'11" female body has been eating the same foods and portions as D.R.'s 6'5" male body - obviously I am going to gain weight!!

I recognize my mind set today, and it is exactly the type of behavior I am trying so hard to change. If I do one bad thing, I feel like I've already blown it and I might as well keep blowing it for the rest of the day. That is so counterintuitive, because I should have just recognized that I missed out on my opportunity to exercise today and forgiven myself for it and continued my day doing the best I could. Instead, not only did I not burn those extra calories exercising, I consumed thousands more calories than I would have if I had eaten normally.

I am also struggling with trying to limit my portion sizes. I have so far just been trying to have small amounts of whatever I want. However, I am the type of person who needs some guidelines or I will keep pushing the limit until I have completely stopped paying attention. So I decided today that I am going to go on the South Beach Diet and try to follow it exactly as it says. The biggest difference between this time and the last time I tried it is that even though I'm following some dieting guidelines, I need to get right back on track if I eat something that is not on the plan. Usually I would just consider my diet blown and fall back into my old habits. To motivate myself and hopefully see a difference, I am considering posting "before" pictures on the blog (IN MY SWIMSUIT - GASP!!!) and posting new ones every six weeks so that I can see a change and keep myself motivated. This is going to be hard for me because even though I believe you are all my friends and family, I don't like to have anyone see me in my swimsuit - I always wear clothes on top. But I think it is what I need to shock myself into getting motivated. So I apologize ahead of time for subjecting everyone to that!!

Today Sandy sent me a link for an article about a book that discusses the connection between being messy and disorganized and gaining weight. It is called (I love this!) Does This Clutter Make My Butt Look Fat? There is an excerpt from there that really hit home, because I am guilty of every single one of these:

Reality check:
The thin clothes that you hope will fit again one day are making you fat.
The baggy clothes you hide behind are making you fat.
The pantry chock full of disorganized food is making you fat.
Even the dining room table covered with mail is making you fat.

It sounds like a very intriguing book, I might just have to buy it!! Also, Sandy mentioned the idea of having a weight loss contest. I have participated in 4 of these at the hospital. The first one cost every participant $50, and only the top 4 places (out of 18) got any money for the highest percentage weight lost at the end. The second one also cost $50, and we went around to local businesses and got them to donate prizes for the weekly highest percentage weight lost, and then the top 5 spots got the entry money at the end. Those were fairly motivating and I actually lost a total of 30 lbs between the two contests, but then I found out I was pregnant two weeks before the end of the second contest and proceeded to gain almost 75 lbs over the next 8 months. Also, since there was so much money and prizes at stake ($1000 to split between the top 5, manicure, pedicure, massage, tanning minutes, etc.), some people were doing drastic and unhealthy things to lose the weight, and 3 to 6 months later almost everyone had put back on the weight they lost during the contest.

The last two contests have been on-your-honor weigh-ins that are free to enter, and you just put in a dollar for every lb you gain during the contest. That was a little too unstructured and didn't work at all for me. Anyway, I would probably consider doing some kind of contest again if the opportunity arose.

Well, I have a very busy day tomorrow : workout, then work at the hospital, then softball, then back to the hospital to get ready for Friday's clinic. I also work at the hospital on Friday, and then we are going to Rapid City this weekend, so I may not post for a few days. I'd better get to bed. Thanks for the positive comments!!